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My Desk and all its finery

2/6/2012 Michaele Duke

I enjoy collecting stuff that for some may see as teetering on the edge. Being a photographer (who believes she missed her true calling - forensic, or crime scene, photography) I am drawn to anything involved with the aftermath of crime.I don't a lot about the field. I'm just curious of the surface that is made visible to the public.
It doesn't take a lot of searching to come up with some off center items only those in the field would appreciate - or maybe not.
Once I offered a token of my appreciation for the good job a law enforcement division had done through a modest pencil holder. I have one on my desk and it has become a subject of conversation with visitors. So of course I was proud of myself when I placed this unique item on the person's desk. There it was, "Dead Fred", a red plastic form of a man, who resembled the typical crime scene layout of a body. A little hole strategically placed where the heart s supposed to be is perfect for a pen (red ink of course). Unfortunately the recipient didn't share my enthusiasm. I haven't noticed Dead Fred in a while....
Many years ago I came across a book about crime scene photos. The book fascinated me and I was angry that I didn't purchase the book when I had the chance. I must have made a big deal over this fact because on my last birthday I was thrilled when I opened a present from my older daughter that contained "Shots in the Dark", a book documenting famous crime scenes.
A couple of years ago Mac gave me a grenade. Its the real thing, except the guts are gone. He knows me. I attached a makeshift tag with the number 1 drawn on it and hung it on the pin. Beside the grenade is a sign that says "Complaint Department. Take a number".
I’ve also been known to ‘acquire’ items through less than admirable means. A while back I visited with my genius friend, Bobby Jonte. During our visit I spied a small bright blue globe on his desk. The plastic blue ball intergued me so that I briefly lost track of our conversation about World War II training planes. Finally I couldn’t stand it any longer and picked it up. To my surprise, it was a paper-clip holder. The hole at the bottom is magnitzed so the paper clips don’t fall out. Mr. Jonte gladly allowed me to swipe it, right in front of him. I have no shame…..
Finally, I have an item that I can't describe in too much detail. It’s an emergency device that I have used when someone has pushed me to the brink with his or her endless bologna-filled chatter. Its a simple device - a round red base with a button on top. A push of the button triggers a piercing noise much like the dive horn on a nuclear submarine. A male voice alerts me that something (smells and usually comes in piles) is being espoused and all should grab their waders and immediately exit the premises. I take care in using it, as not to offend any innocent bystanders. However, my boss made me move it out of most visitors’ field of vision after the late Charlie Walker saw it. Between us, he thought it was hilarious...so did Peggy.
Well, I've opened my desk (and quirks) to our readers. Now I'm asking you enterprising desk jockeys to do the same. If anybody has a penchant for the peculiar or just has some unique items they display on their desk, (that may mysteriously end up on my desk) send me a photo and a few lines describing what I'm looking at. I sure hope I get a few responses. Otherwise, I'm gonna begin to worry...about myself.



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