In India, many marriages are still arranged by parents.  They check out a prospective marriage partner’s wealth, status and caste. As “modern” as India has become, this is one of the main battlegrounds still left in that society.  
In some “gotras” or “clans,” you can be killed if you marry someone deemed inappropriate for any number of reasons.  It doesn’t matter if you’ve been married a day or a week or years...a group of older men called the caste council can declare the marriage dishonorable.  In that case, you either divorce and marry another man or die.
 According to government figures, over 100 couples were separated, ostracized or killed last year in one state alone!  This seems to be a backlash against the “modernization” of India.
The dowry system is very much in play there.  A dowry is the money or property brought to a man by his bride.  Hund-reds of thousands of female fetuses are aborted every year in sex-selective abortions.  They want boys, who grow into men, who get the dowry!!!  The caste system dominates most people’s lives.  This is an ancient Hindu social custom that places everyone in four main “groups” or “castes” and thousands of sub-castes.  You are supposed to marry within your caste according to this system.
Last year in New Delhi, a couple was electrocuted and beaten to death by members of the wife’s family for disobeying caste rules.  The Supreme Court has now stepped in and is trying to stop the killing.  This social change will come very slowly.
Now, here in America, we are a little more genteel about the whole thing.  We may not CHOOSE a spouse for our children but you’d better believe we try to influence.  We may not use the “caste system” as such, but I’ve never heard anyone say, “Son, sure you should marry her!  Why, her family still drives that noisy, scratched up truck, the one Horace hit them deer with three times.  And I hear their daddy is about to get out of jail again so the timin’ is just about perfect!  I wonder if they’re still tryin’ to run that moonshine over ta Greeleyville.”  Nor have I heard, “Of course, you can marry him.  Why, when he gets them front teeth fixed, he’ll look just fine.
 I believe he’s got one of them fancy two room tents you can live in fer awhile.  And you know when his sister got married, they had the reception at Brunson’s Crossroads.  Why, I understand from Preacher Pipkin that he’s just about got to where he can even read one whole verse out of the King James Bible.”  
And dowry?!  HA!!  I was prize enough!  And besides that, can you imagine you and your daughter having to save money and property to give to a man in order for her to marry him?!   Might as well just go shoot him right then and keep her at home, dontcha think?
We may not arrange the marriages over here but it might not be such a bad idea.... I personally  know of folks who have at least WANTED to knock off some of their in-laws.  Haven’t you!?   When I lived up in the hills of I won’t say where, it wasn’t unheard of to hear about someone on a family hiking trip accidentally “falling” headfirst off of a cliff.  Occasionally, a horrible hunting “accident” would occur during an all male, family hunting trip.  And I understand some rivers are just plum full of hungry alligators and poisonous snakes strong enough to tip over a boat.  According to Tyler Perry’s “Madea”, you can always fix a very special pie for your husband and afterwards,  live off his insurance.  (The very special pie is poisoned.  Madea enjoyed a rather wealthy lifestyle after serving this pie to several of her husbands.)
When learning of his daughter’s upcoming nuptials, one man I know said, “Well, I’ve always said when it comes to our children's’ weddings, we have to accept whatever the cat drug up.”  Maybe he needs to move to India......
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