Lets hear it for predictions

  • Tuesday, September 2, 2014

Michaele Duke

I知 writing this column on a Thursday before the Labor Day weekend. By the time the paper comes out, opening day for Dove season will be over, opening day for deer season will be over, the holiday will be over, the election will be over and we値l either have a new senator or a runoff election will bring us back to the polls in 15 days.

The passing of these major events presents a unique opportunity for me to make a few predictions.

The week before the holiday our highways saw some terrible accidents. I predict the long Labor Day weekend will see at least one more crash, given the history of holidays. I also predict more than a few decent law-biding citizens will succumb to the abundance of festivities and will have spent the night in a 4x8 room adorned with a fancy open metal door for having a little too much fun - or maybe not enough.

I predict the election - will not see a lot of voters, given the voting record of Williamsburg County. We致e seen local elections won with only a few dozen voters showing up at the polls.

I predict in their season opener the South Carolina Gamecocks will be mercilessly gored by the Texas Aggies. Is a brood of scrawny two-legged Gamecocks known for spurring 230 pound - plus or minus a few - bulls?

I predict I値l be run out of town for even thinking that.

I predict a lot of bird hunters will go home with meager harvests, even though they come to the field equipped with the finest shotguns, cases of shells and anything else they believe could possibly give them an edge over the tiny winged daredevils.

I predict I値l be the one cleaning our harvest if in fact we bag any.

Of course I really made these predictions with the hope I will be wrong on every instance: Otherwise it痴 going to be a pitiful week for some.

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